New Spy Episodes, Novels, Comic Books based in the Country's 1st (and still hidden) Spy Complex, to help turn Columbus' Frightening Hilltop into the Midwest's Hollywood



1880: 30-feet under Sullivant's Hill, behind Columbus's horrifying lunatic asylum (the world’s largest building in SF), a brilliant new product (lightbulbs) suddenly made this underground Civil War weapons factory far too useful to ignore.

Because this 1100-foot concrete facility sat under the center of America’s railroad network (mathematically), President Hayes chose it to headquarter ORPHAN, the US Secret Service’s first actually “secret” division.


Why? From here, ORPHAN agents and America's top-secret "stuff" could be dispatched to most of the country faster than from any other location.

March 7, 1885,  1:32 AM


Ohio’s former governor and ex-president Rutherford B. Hayes, now ORPHAN’s commander, put his undercover agency under its first 'CLASS-A EMERGENCY!'


​Several hours earlier, Thomas Edison, the most famous man in the Western World, held the international debut of his two newest products at Columbus’s Metropolitan Opera House.   FYI: It occupied 127 North High Street until it burned down in 1892.


His audience included two former presidents, several dozen of the nation’s greatest inventors, 1200 fans, and 600 reporters. Around four thousand more fans lined that pony-poop-covered street for three blocks south, to the Neil House Hotel.


His first product reveal, “The Light Cannon” (1st spotlight), went wonderfully.  It debuted during this musical featuring ‘The Buckeye Beauties,’ six beautiful local song and dance girls.


Edison’s next reveal, his Electro-Wonder-Stagecoach, sent drool dribbling down the chins of 19th-century nurds.



This was the world's first stagecoach with a dome light.


The first twenty were lined up behind the music hall’s stage door. They would be revealed in a parade after the show, transporting the (illuminated) VIPs to the after-party at the Neil House.


The sexy (for 1885) musical “Ladies Come First,” written by Sara Kilbourne, the Buckeye Beauties’ leader, naturally placed these six gorgeous girls in the lead coach.  


As these lovely ladies waited in their rolling wonder for the VIPs to board the others, theirs suddenly took off like a bat out of hell.

Two minutes later, it vanished into Columbus’s Union Train Station complex.

From inside ORPH Six, a low-slung, weapon-packed locomotive (secretly earth’s fastest vehicle), ORPHAN agents Lemont Freeman, Colin Mclaughlin (Sara’s manfriend), and Nicola Tesla track the girls to New Orleans.

Unintentionally, like an action-packed version of “Q” from James Bond movies, Tesla created these rail-rockets, as well as whatever gadget Mclaughlin and Freeman need on the fly.  


Painted white with red crosses, ORPHS (Orphan Ambulances) just hid in plain sight. They were (supposedly) racing along the nation’s rails, rushing emergency medical aid to the 1.7 million orphan children Europe was dumping into America’s open arms.


They find the girls happily under the (herbily enhanced) spell of the world’s wealthiest narcissist, the crazy handsome Tyberious Maximus Cross. But, while trying to rescue them, Agents Freeman, Mclaughlin, and Tesla stumble over the greatest threat to the nation since the war.


In 1859, after inheriting the planet’s largest shipping company, Cross became the Confederacy’s primary financier.  Now in 1885, his most profitable international venture is still trading slaves.


After nabbing a folder from Cross’s floating office aboard his 300’ foot Maximus V (the swiftest and most beautiful ship on earth), the agents discover his dastardly plan. His version of the Confederacy is about to win the Civil War, twenty years late, to restore slavery nationwide. 

His massive scale attack is ready to launch, using the planet’s first wireless (remotely controlled) weapons of mass destruction.

​Three years earlier, Cross's ‘White Knights” stole 17 notebooks from the newly arrived Nicola Tesla. His engineers rapidly weaponized over a dozen of Tesla’s designs. At his hidden compounds in Cuba (and his 36 Caribbean Islands), slaves had just finished building his enormous remotely controlled arsenal. ​Cross had to be stopped immediately.


Tesla and a navel engineer stuff one of ORPH 6’s secret electric drive units into a 20' foot steamboat so the team can race through the Gulf of Mexico, trying to save the nation.

​Do you like wild spy gadgets, weapon-packed speed machines, tyrants bent on domination, monstrous henchmen, sexy ladies, and sarcastic super-spies attacking secret military compounds single-handedly?​


If so, the Southern Cross is for you!

The first 12 pages set the stage; then, almost non-stop, super-spy action takes over. We recommend this Novel for people with Attention Deficit Disorder (like its author). 


This Novel, the Southern Cross, will be divided into 12 cliff-hanging TV episode scripts. Each will be storyboarded into comic book form. In addition, video versions with voices, sound effects, and music will be produced for international web forums like YouTube.

The printed comic books should only be available in person at Upper Columbus businesses. However, since they are not intended to be thrown away, these will contain long-term message ads from Upper Columbus businesses.

​CGI Movies and TV show episodes (also produced in Upper Columbus) are the ultimate goals for these "ORPHAN" and “Postal” Agent escapades.


Postal is ORPHAN’s switch from rail-rolling around the nation to flying trick aircraft labeled “U.S. Air-Mail.”  Postal opened in 1927 when the US Postal Service opened the Midwest's Air-Mail-Port right across the street (Sullivant Avenue) from ORPHAN underground.  


The author created the brilliant herculean agent Lemont Freeman’s character (Aunt Jemima’s son) for Lebron James to play after he retires. 

However, Mr. James has not yet been notified of his future.​

These ORPHAN and Postal Agent stories are all works of fiction.  Or are they?  

Check out this crude video to see for yourself: